They cànt take u to be so simple and straight..

Boys... Sorry if I am generalising here, I beg ur pardon in advance but what I'm gonna write is based on what I have experienced.. The ego of boys is so big in them that they can't even take the slightest blow to that.. They talk of equàl thoughts, being straight forward and independent thoughts and personality but when it come to actually accept all these they take it so personally.. Seems like someone had done a surprise attack on their ego and they retaliate that too in a harsh way.. They don't understand that it hurts.. I was never able to understand there so called thought process.. How they come to an unusual conclusion is beyond my analysing abilities.. Might be I am poor in that.. But I am worse in facing those results.. If it would have possible to eraß ßome ingredients from your personality, I would have gone for the touchyness I start feeling with people when I meet them.. People always say they never let go whom they like, but I also believed in letting them know that they are not supposed to go.. I guess in today's world of materialism this is not what people deserve to know ( in people I am also included).. I guess its better to hide the truth and display the fake character they need us to play.. Guys do change.. If u are accepted for what u are, have courage to accept others for what they are.. Change is rule of life but not required foundation. It must just shape  the design but not decide the course of it... U won't understand ever but it hurts.. 

marriages are said to made in heaven but tolerated on earth.

I never assumed life to be so more life taking then it is now.. I was a joyous person with easy to go attitude but the type of situation time offered had taken all of my essence for life.. I never assumed for life to be all flowers and no thorns but it has its own basket to give from.. Being a girl in the Indian society never give u much space for thinking for all flower and I never did.. But yes assumed it to be simple.. The kind of situation I am going through now a days let my belief grew more stronger that the institutions created by man are the worst invention of all time.. Be it society, Marriages or anyyhing else.. They were made for the good of so called patriarchal world.. Where man always wanted to be dominating.. Where rules can be moulded açcording to his choice, how he can play safe... Where individual words were not given much space if they come from an ordinary man ohhh sorry ordinary women.. They were supposed to be a listening piece of their order decree.. And whenever attempts were made to break the rules of the game, they were disqualified.. I was never able to find the reason behind our submission.. We were also made to fly and we were stopped every time.. And the so called institution "Marriage" which was in the name of safety of our rights was made most useful and usable place to exploit us... To tolerate was made its main key to keep going but it was assumed to be kept by us.. The way marriages take place here is something very weird to my understanding.. A stranger suddenly becomes the master of your life.. We are bought up with the words that do what he say.. Are we made for so?? I know we are not always right.. I know relationship sustain with understanding and compromises but from both the sides... Bad understanding results in worst marriage and it has impact on not only two persons but on two families.. I know God has made us much clever and brainy than others.. But he made us emotional too.. We can solve any problem if we wish for it..  And we can wordsen any matter if we decide for it..  I, on this platform, just want to share that happiness is nevr readymade it is always earned with hard efforts for love and feelings.. Don't put its stake in danger with few unreasonable choice because of so called society pressure.. If we have happiness we will share it.. But we must aim for it with reason and choices . 

life and its complicacies

So this was life assumed to shape itself.. To be frank, I always tried my hard to understand what it needs from me, but each time I failed.. And the biggest support of my life is shaking from its bottom.. Why it happens that what we expect is not worth expecting for others? Why is it like that what we express, is virtuality for others,  but what they say is practicality? Just because our views do not go hand in hand with  others, do that means we r always wrong just because conclusion is inferred by those who matters for us than any thing in our life.. I know we can't share the same views with every one and nor do we make people expect what we expect but do that make our expectations vulnerable enough to be ruled out.. And when the point comes when you have choose between your area of thoughts and next persons life area in our life, the ball has go in that court.. This is what life made me learn till now.. I am not saying I am always right.. In fact if taken into consideration general perception, I guess it would come out that I am 90 % time below practicality but that doesn't mean I am not fair with things.. May be that kind of thoughts lead to new kind of school.. I am stubborn.. In my views yes I am.. Compromises is my cupof tea only when served with kind of snacks I find worth eating.. Balance is what I always find the nearest way to deal with situation..  But if it will shift, my inertia will definitely come into action.. Law of science.. Can't help it.. If I respect ur ways of life, mind that I respect mine even more.. It's just that I let u lead urs.. So should u..

One more of reason..

Ae kash ki aisa hota..
Raat ka andhera jald dhal sa jata..

Wo aane wale pal kuch der ruk jate..
Kuch awaazein hum sun hi na paatein..

Beete kal ki aahato mai itna darr hai bassa..
Ki aane wale pal ki umeed ne bhi sehma hai diya..

Thokre itni milli chalti raaho main..
Ki manzilo se ab hai nhi koi kashish..

Life is a struggle.. My friend used to say this to me always when I used to get low.. But sometimes this struggle goes to that level that no matter what's gonna be end result, u just hate the path.. I used to love life for its variencies, its complicacies.. The path was difficult always but it was fel worth moving.. But now the stage has reached when everything is so meaningless.. I never felt so worthless.. I was kinda gal which hugged the way no matter what it lays on it coz I used to love the destination.. But the way path has put forward its negativies, I lost my all love in it.. I want to get up, move forward, and go on.. I need that one more reason to love the way I used to.. And that one reason and method is I guess ignorance and that's it..
 Believe me guys, its never gonna be easy, and for a Indian girl it would never be.. To go on, to not let ur threshold of tolerance break is the key.. For me, each time it breaks, I push the limits a bit of up, and then try to move.. But its never easy.. The painn is sometimes unbearable.. But then easy way never lead to precious world..ihopemy way gets me to the world of selflessness, tolerance and acceptance.. After all life is also about change..

Back with a bang

Hey.. So I'm here again after a long.. The life has been so busy through out.. But the mind never stopped thinking of writing , of sharing , of telling the world what it think of it , and the worldly feeling , that keep on jumbling from here and there.. People say experience is the best teacher one can have in his life.. So true are they.. But more than experience what makes people more mature and knowledgeable is the understanding of the true meaning hidden in those experience s.. When I see myself in the past and what I am today, I can see a great amount of difference in me. Ya I was immature enough to make things complicated, not only for me but for others also.. Butnas I moved on, life presented before a lot of variety of situations to deal with, that too in variety of fields.. I was entering a love door, I was leaving the same door at the same time.. Ya true.. I was on the edge of success and took other aspects of life.. What I was demanding fro m it was not what it has in its pocket.. I was childish enough to assume that everything will go on like this.. But then a angel came in my life.. He was not of much importance earlier but today he is one of the most important person I have.. He was more than a friend.. He was a guide to me.. At any turn, if I shattered or got confused about the right way, he was there to help me out.. He made me laugh, he made me cry. He made me learn the toughest lessons of my life.. He let me learn the pain in such a beautiful way that today I can stand anything or any moment no matter I am alone or accompanied by someone.. Earlier I just used to consider him as my friend but now he is much more than that. He is the true mentor,a great ideal as a child to me, a rock of determination, a river with flexible path but never changing its path and destination.. People say love is the most ptous feeling we people can have.. But believe me when love is overpowered by respect and deep belief for each other, this feeling called love seems so small.. I respect my angel like God and my parents. He let me knew the true essence of true happiness.. He is different in many way possiblble but the way he care for others, combines extremism of both ends and yet following moderation is yet any uncovered magic he holds which I need to discover.. They say life changes when it assumes the set time.. But it can never change the way I feel for any1.. Respect has very earlier had overtaken the bus of luv. And now he is on driving seat, combining some beautiful example of truthiness and simplicity and yet so elegant in its own special way.. 

A TALK WITH BEST FRIEND...

Friends.. They are your words that speak, your words meant to be heard, your image reflecting in different ways..  Talking with them never let you see the watch.. Those discussions starting from any trifle point proceeds in such a way that it takes an extraordinary turn to hot debates. You become so yourself while discussions that words refuses to break the flow.. You put yourself exactly what you are without fearing of the fact that what kind of image those words are gonna make of you in your audience's mind.. your audience is so much intimate with you that your thoughts are not gonna make any difference in the relationship you share with them.. I too own such an audience.. They reflect me to me.. I fight with them.. I demand from them.. I go away from them.. I want to be near them always.. I may not talk with them when i don't feel like.. i call them in late hours too when i feel like.. we know we are their in each other's heart and mind even if we are on no talking terms due to some silly fight.. i know every friend feels the same.. Talking of topics which we shared while driving are some of differences we had in views over how to deal with different situations in life.. he had the concept of making situations adjustable with the circumstances.. i had the argument that those dreams adjusted with any sort of situation does not yield the satisfaction which would make us feel all happy about it.. the adjustment would always give us the pain of goals which we could have achieved.. he said instead of crying for uncompleted dreams and situations which cannot be either dealt and passed off, we must act accordingly. that will make all satisfied and happy.. he was correct if viewed with the glass of practicality.. but if the person is of the kind I am, i surely knows nothing but the originality can alone satisfy and douse my thirst.. then discussion took the turn to idea of friendship.. although I don't know how we moved there.. i put forward the idea of complete transparency in it.. sharing instantly what we have in our minds.. he had the added factor of delay in it.. awkwardness must be avoided that's what he said.. I said the kind of friends i make, awkwardness cannot even exist anywhere around.. the level of trust, understanding and togetherness make you feel one.. delay can produce spots on the surface of relationship.. and number of repetition can make them penetrate deep in the core which can be dangerous.. at that the only thing that can help maintaining the relation is depth of love.. what is more important either the person or the stain?? We both agreed on the level of understanding that exists any relationship but with different definitions.. he believed in post situation understanding while i believed in pre-situation understanding.. we share a lot of things from our careers, dreams, jokes, ambitions, pain to the family..we are not together just by word friend but very much more than it.. and i am afraid rather have fear that very soon its gonna have a setback.. not because of any differences but because of other relations.. i just wanna express that my friend will always be there in my thoughts and my heart no matter i communicate or not.. the special place would always be his... 

MY CHOICE..

What comes in your mind at first when you listen the word "choice"?? it can be 6 letter word for many of you but come here, I can help you meet a lot of people for whom this little word means a lot.. For most of us, this word might have taken its way to aloofness as for us to do what we want to is more of regular thing rather than anything special thing to celebrate.. but there are a lot of people for whom to make a choice is not at all in choices to be chosen.. think of a situation when you need to select for your undergraduate subject.. for lot of people, thinking of having an under-graduation degree is not at all in their choice-list.. I everyday see lots of faces which look at the students going for studies with temptation in their eyes and helplessness on their faces.. do they choose to have that helplessness?? do they enjoy that temptation?? no.. they scream-out loud deep in their heart.. but they don't have any choice.. For us, getting the degrees is part of our journey which has to be followed.. but for them its somewhere else apart from the road, cut-offed from their journey route.. they have to dig their own way to it.. and its not about just schooling.. its about every small wish.. whether to eat of their choice, wear what they want, doing things of their choices.. they are helpless by destiny but we are indifferent by choice.. Today, in the era of empowerment-talks (it is the most hot topic of discussion in media and privileged people), I just want to put forward some queries of my mind.. we talk about women empowerment the most.. but why is it only focused around dresses, sex and late night parties.. No doubt we must have choices in those also.. but their are girls, who still struggle for their way out of home for their basic needs.. and I want include decision-making, freedom of expression in words (write or say) and future plans in their basic necessities.. for them denial of dresses or late night parties is not at all the issue but to let not their soul feel contented surely is.. lack of contentment has disastrous effect on any human being.. and it much more dangerous when it is denied to you without giving chances.. also can you answer yourself,. lets talk about marriage.. here choices can take a negative turn.. because understanding in positive sense can make way for a happy and settled life, not just for but for your near and dear ones.. I'm not supporting for compromising on dreams, I just wish for collective decision rather than single on its timing.. understanding must not be confused with giving up.. you have your thoughts and ideas, and they are unique to you, but when you associates yourself with some person for life, the implementation of those ides must be done in a careful way which can be defended if needed.. your choices must not make some else suffer.. CHOICES must be selfish when needed but their destination must be selfless.. their results must encompass those who are deprived of it.. It must create a self-creating chain.. I guess only then can my choice is on its right way..

May be being alone is my destiny for today

but believe me bringing you closer is my destination for tomorrow..

may be i am standing single at this moment

but believe me i will bring you near me in my row..

may be Choices have to selfish in execution..

but believe me they will make wider the ways which were narrow..